If You Want Me To: When Suffering & Grace Meet

Then the Lord said,

“I have surely seen the affliction of my people who are in Egypt

and have heard their cry because of their taskmasters.

I know their sufferings, and I have come down to deliver them

out of the hand of the Egyptians and to bring them up out of that land

 to a good and broad land, a land flowing with milk and honey…

Exodus 3:7-8 (ESV)

Suffering.

It isn’t something many of us would raise our hand and say, “Sign me up!” No, suffering, if we are all honest, is something we wish we could avoid at any point in our lives. Suffering means pain, unfamiliarity, being uncomfortable, or not getting an answer to the question, “Why?” In most cases, suffering doesn’t seem fair whether we’re the ones experiencing it or seeing someone else being dealt this unfortunate hand.

But with Christ, that’s where grace steps in.

Many of you know my mom recently passed away very unexpectantly. She was going in for a routine surgery (one she has had 4 times) but this time she never woke up. It feels like it has been an eternity, but I look at my calendar and realize it has only been 2 months. There are the typical “good and bad days” and some days that I honestly don’t know what to call them.

I remember crying out to God and begging Him to restore my mom’s health here on earth and to not take her from us. I remember telling Him, “If only you could see, if only you knew, God, how much glory you would receive if you would physically heal my mom here on earth and wake her up. You have no idea! If only…” There were and are many things I have said to God that I thought I couldn’t say. But He meets me with His grace. Grace to come to Him in my most honest and fearful moments and tell Him what’s on my heart, even if it isn’t nice. For example, I said (and sometimes still say) to Him that it wasn’t enough to know that she would be in a better place. I’ve learned in this season that honesty doesn’t scare God like it scares me. He isn’t caught off guard that I tell Him that I’m mad at Him. He isn’t thrown into disarray when I tell Him, that in the moment, I don’t believe that He is good. These are all the feelings that I have brought to God in the past 2 months and that I’m sure I will continue to bring to Him for a while.

 A friend of mine, who is recently experiencing a tough season with one of her parent’s health, reminded me that feelings aren’t truth. Just because I feel one way towards God one day and another the next, doesn’t speak of His character, but speaks of my deceitful heart. It is an ever-constant reminder that feelings aren’t truth. Feelings are fleeting. What truly lasts is the Truth I know of God.  I know that He sees, hears and knows my suffering apart from what I may feel. In the verse above, His word clearly states that He saw, heard and knew the Israelite’s suffering and groaning. And because I know that our Father never changes, He still sees, hears and knows my past, present and future suffering. His word tells us: “For He knows our frame; He remembers that we are dust.” (Psalm 103:14) The same “know” here is the same Greek word used in the verse mentioned above. The Greek for this is “yada`” which means, knowledge, perceive, acquaintance, to know by experience. Because Jesus walked in this same flesh (though free from sin), He experienced hunger, thirst, and even grief. Matthew Henry said,

Even the secret sorrows of God’s people are known to Him.

God is so familiar with our sorrow because He too experienced not only the loss of His union with His people (when Adam and Eve sinned) but with the death of His son, Jesus. So I know He knows. And because I know this Truth, my heart can be quiet and settled in the hard days.

           

I wonder on many occasions why my mom had to die at her age and during a time when I really need my mom the most. I cry when I think that she won’t be here for big moments in my life. These are all honest moments of grief and it’s okay. So if you’re reading this and you too are going through suffering/grief, bring these feelings, thoughts and quiet days where you honestly don’t know what to think or do, to a Father who doesn’t require you to have it all together, have a smile on your face because “you’re a Christian,” or to even like Him during your suffering or time of grief. Or if you're a friend or family member walking with someone going through grief, let them know it is okay to be not okay. Let them grieve in the way they need to (unless it is unhealthy). If you see they've had a hard day, maybe get them a "happy" to help brighten their day. If they don't want to talk, I have learned that silence is very healing in some ways. Embrace and share that silence with them. Ultimately pray for them and ask God to show you ways to love them in this season.
If we picture God as a terrifying, uncompassionate God, it is hard to take things so tender like the loss of a parent to Him. But if we remember that He is a compassionate Father (Psalm 86:15; Romans 8:14-16; Galatians 4:5-7), we know that He cares so intentionally for us in every moment of our suffering. We are loved, known, cared for, disciplined, by not just a God who is Almighty and Just but by a forever Faithful, Unwavering and Sovereign— even when it feels like everything is lost—Father. Whatever suffering looks like for you, entrust it to a Faithful God who walks with you through this season.

I have come to realize the true reality of life. I feel that it is cliché to say that but honestly I see how quickly our lives here on earth pass by. My mom was only 60. My cousin who passed way 10 years ago was only 24. We aren’t guaranteed a long and prosperous life here on earth but we are guaranteed an eternal life with Christ if we choose to let Him in our lives.

He [Satan] would rather us be faithlessly prosperous than afflicted and faithful. … Often it is in the taking away that our true love and trust are revealed, which is a great mercy to us and usually for others. And often, in this age, the most valuable, most satisfying, most beneficial, longest lasting gifts we receive and pass along to others end up coming through the experiences of our losses.

Jon Bloom, What God Gives When He Takes Away (Find the article here)

We aren’t guaranteed ultimate happiness when we trust Christ, or that bad things won’t happen, but we are ensured to a God who works all things together, safeguarded by a God who is a moment-by-moment sustainer. We are given a Father who gives only good gifts (Yes, even suffering is a gift even when it doesn’t seem like it) to His children. An Intercessor for days we can’t figure out how to get what’s in our heart/mind out into words.  With these truths in hand, I can live my life here for His glory. Even in my suffering I can cry and He can get glory. I can be upset and He can still get glory.  I can be honest and He can still get glory.

So I choose not to waste one ounce or moment of this season because nothing is wasted in His hands.

If You Want Me To

Ginny Owens

The pathway is broken and the signs are unclear

And I don't know the reason why You brought me here

But just because You love me the way that You do

I'm gonna walk through the valley if You want me to

No I'm not who I was when I took my first step

And I'm clinging to the promise You're not through with me yet

So if all of these trials bring me closer to You

Then I will go through the fire if You want me to

It may not be the way I would have chosen

When You lead me through a world that's not my home

But You never said it would be easy

You only said I'd never go alone

So when the whole world turns against me and I'm all by myself

And I can't hear You answer my cries for help

I'll remember the suffering Your love put You through

And I will walk through the darkness if You want me to

When I cross over Jordan, I'm gonna sing, gonna shout

I'm gonna look into Your eyes and see, You never let me down
So take me on the pathway that leads me home to You
And I will walk through the valley if You want me to

the cost of christmas

Christmas is one of my favorite holidays not just because of the variety of homemade goodies or family coming from different places, but one reason I love Christmas is because there are so many memories. Memories of time with family members who may not be with us this year or memories of getting “that one gift” I kept pestering my parents to get me.

But one thing that has come to my mind this year, and really in the past few days, is the cost of Christmas. No, not how much you spend on gifts or a Honey Baked Ham, but the true cost of Christmas. The cost of a Holy, Perfect, Righteous Savior coming down to earth. His coming wasn’t in a huge flash of light or even a whirlwind, but He came ever so softly as a humble baby.

Thankfully the Story didn’t stop there. Within His lifespan He gave selflessly. Hegave Hope to the hopeless, He gave Living Water to the thirsty, and He ultimatelygave His life. Before He came that night, He knew the cost. He knew what it would take to ransom His children, so He did what any Father would do, He gaveeverything He had to save them.

So as we gather around our Christmas trees, open presents, and sing wonderful Christmas songs, let us remember the value of why we get to sing and celebrate. There is so much more value in the Christmas season (and every moment in our lives) because Christ made it valuable by laying in the manger that night in Bethlehem and later laying down His life on the Cross.

Come behold the wondrous mystery
In the dawning of the King
He the theme of heaven’s praises
Robed in frail humanity

In our longing, in our darkness
Now the light of life has come
Look to Christ, who condescended,
Took on flesh to ransom us.

Come behold the wondrous mystery
Christ the Lord upon the tree
In the stead of ruined sinners
Hangs the Lamb in victory

See the price of our redemption
See the Father’s plan unfold
Bringing many sons to glory
Grace unmeasured, love untold.

“Come Behold the Wondrous Mystery” by Matt Papa

untitled

"...and your reward will be exceedingly great."- genesis 15:1

As you can see in the picture, I have taped this quote (thanks to a friend's instagram) next to my light switch so that every day/night when I turn my light on/off, I remember the Truth in those words. I don't know about you, but that quote in that picture has done a work on my pride. I'll tell you why later.

This past Sunday night at church, our pastor spoke about Abram. Before his name was changed, before he saw God's promise in his life, he still trusted God. He still had faith, because of one solid fact:

| he had God's word |

Our pastor also spoke about how just like Abram, our "reward is not a 'what' but a 'whom.'" And that's what hit me. All the things I do "for God" are sometimes, not for him because I somehow think that there is a reward that's better than what He gives. I think that human praise, what others think of me, how well/fast I can accomplish something, my degree, my gifts are better. And that is a lie from the enemy. A very cleaver lie, that it almost seems like truth....almost. Our pastor also talked about how we strive and strive for that "one thing" in our lives so that we can finally be satisfied. When he mentioned that, I immediately felt conviction. For me, honestly, right now, it's marriage.

The Lord really opened my eyes to see that I have been seeking a "what" and not a "Whom." Not just in the marriage category but in every category of my life. I have been seeking to please others and make sure they "like" me and to strive to be at the right place at the right time in hopes that "the one" will be there when God is simply asking me to be all there for Him. He is asking me to trade in my singular idea of a reward (marriage, praise, etc.) for an "exceedingly great" and eternal Reward. He isn't asking me to have the right feelings but to simply trust Him where He has placed me in this season. To trust, as that quote says, that He is working even when my feelings (which are wavering) make me think differently. You know why this hurts my pride? Because I think that I must do/or feel something in order to receive what God has for me. That is also a lie. It's not about me. I must surrender what I feel (or don't feel), what I have dreamed of, to an ever Faithful and all Sovereign God who has "...written every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them" (Psalm 139:16b). To surrender all of what I fear the most and all that I hold on to to a God who doesn't ask me to feel a certain way about surrendering but commands me to give all I desire to Him because the reward is great. Because ultimately the reward isn't a spouse, it isn't a chance to buy my own home, it isn't a chance to make something of myself, but the reward is simply but at the same time, most exceedingly and abundantly great, and the reward is Jesus. Jesus. That's it? No, He's ALL. He's better, more able, more satisfying, more worthy of chasing after, He is more. We, just like Abram, have to step out (daily) of our fear and our "what we've dreamed of's" and into Faith. Faith that God is who He says He is and that He is in the business of giving us His best, even when we think we know what's "better." And despite what we feel, He is working. In the end, HE will be our sight, and He will be our Great Reward. 

So we have God's Word that our reward will be great but my flesh asks, "Is that enough? or "What if it isn't what I planned?" But His Word reminds me, I never planned anything. He holds my lot, and He has placed the "boundary lines" (see Psalm 16) for my protection so that I may see that "indeed I have a beautiful inheritance."

Therefore my heart is glad, and my whole being rejoices;

my flesh also dwell secure. for You will not abandon my soul

to Sheol, or let Your holy one see corruption.

You make known to me the path of life; 

in Your presence there is fullness of Joy;

at Your right hand are pleasures forevermore.

Psalm 16:9-11

Planted, Rooted, Grounded

I wrote this blog for work, and thought I would share it on my blog as well! Enjoy! Hope you are encouraged!

The other day I was sitting outside and planning on getting some reading done in the Word. As I began to read I couldn't seem to get focused. My attention was elsewhere and honestly, I didn’t want to read. Though my mind was in a million different places, I felt the Lord saying to me, “Just be quiet. Be still.” So I did just that. I was drawn to this tree that is right outside the deck of my apartment. The blooms had fallen off of it and it was somewhat bare. The only thing I could see were a few tiny blooms trying to peak out. The unique thing is just a few weeks earlier the tree was absolutely full of beautiful blooms. Well here in Alabama, the seasons change quite frequently so one minute it is like summer time and the next it is freezing cold. I knew that had a great deal to do with it, but the Lord slowly began showing me something deeper.

Rivers in the Desert

So many times we get caught up in comparing our lives with those around us or even planning/worrying for our future and wondering why something hasn’t happened yet or asking why our life isn’t a certain way. While I was sitting there looking at this tree, I began thinking of how that tree used to look and how beautiful it was with all of its blooms. It reminded me of how I forget to see the beauty even in the hard season. The Lord reminded me that throughout every season (the most bountiful and the most barren) in our lives, He is still our Creator and Sustainer. He is constant. We don't always have to have these beautiful “blooms” to glorify Him. Yes, we want to strive for fruit in our lives, but there will be seasons where the fruit is not yet in season and is still having time to sprout. He is still working a new thing in our lives we just have to see it through an eternal perspective. It reminds me of the passage in Isaiah 43:19 and 20b:

Behold, I am doing a new thing;

it now springs forth, do you not perceive it?

I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in desert.

...for I give water in the wilderness,

rivers in the desert.

I remember thanking the Lord that I can be “bare” in front of Him and still be glorious, even when there aren't any present blooms. He allows the blooms/fruit to spring up at the right time even when we think we are done growing. Even in the barren seasons, there is fruit growing! The Lord uses the lyrics to this song in many ways in my life, especially during this “teaching” time:

Though I'm bare and cold,

I know my seasons coming,

and I'll spring up in Your endless Faithfulness.

(For Your Splendor by Christy Nockels)

This is such a hard lesson to learn and remember throughout the desert seasons. Many times we think we aren't producing the “right” fruit because it doesn't look like what someone else is producing. That is where the Enemy can take a hold of us and cause to grow weary searching after something that the Lord didn't plant in our lives. In the book of Ruth one thing that the Lord taught me is that she stayed where she was planted. She gleaned in her own field and in the end it produced a wonderful harvest.

Ruth listened to God and did not abandon His promises for her. I want to have this type of character that she produced as well as what the prophet Isaiah said,

And your ears shall hear a word behind you, saying,

“This is the way, walk in it,”

when you turn to the right or when you turn to the left.

Isaiah 30:21

Planted

I ask that the Lord will produce in me the desire to trust Him in every season. He reminds us constantly in His word that He is the one who waters and grows. We are to be planted right where He wants us. We don't have to worry about how “big” we will grow or if we will be like those around us. God didn't call us to be like those around us, He calls us to be who He created us to be, and in the end we will be a beautiful display of His glory (blooms or no blooms).

Blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD,

whose trust is the LORD.

He is like a tree planted by the water,

that sends out its roots by the stream,

and does not fear when heat comes,

for its leaves remain green,

and is not anxious in the year of drought,

for it does not cease to bear fruit.
Jeremiah 17:7-8

Streams of Mercy...

I have been meaning to post this for quite some time, but I have forgotten! And I have also noticed that I haven't blogged in a while! So here is my story... enjoy:

:Adopt: 

“to choose to take as one’s own; make one’s own by selection; to take or receive into any kind of new relationship.” 

“to affirm, embrace, seize, take over”

           Almost a year ago, I was asked to blog about my adoption story for Lifeline Children's Services blog. I started working there almost a year ago, and I have had the amazing opportunity to work alongside such an amazing ministry that cries out to the Father on behalf of the fatherless. As you read about my adoption story, my prayer is that you are encouraged and filled up with the Father’s love and affection for you as you read what He has done in my life!
At six weeks old, I was adopted into a wonderful family. I have a wonderful mother, father, and older brother. Through the years I have also gained a sister-in-law and a niece and a nephew who is due in a few months!
            I always knew I was adopted. My parents always told me I was adopted, and always wanted me to know. They always told me I was theirs from the beginning and that they never wanted to keep it from me. The funny thing is when I tell people I am adopted, they look very surprised because I look a lot like my mom and dad! Even my best friend in high school didn’t believe I was adopted!
            I grew up in an amazing and loving home. My family is very important to me and I am so thankful that the Lord chose them to be my family. Through the Lord, I have been blessed with a huge family on my dad’s side (30+ cousins!) and a small, loving and caring family on my mom’s side. There was never a time in my life that I didn’t feel loved by my family. My mom tells me stories of the first day they brought me home from the agency. She told me of the many family members and friends that came by the house the first day I was home. So it is safe to say, I was loved from the moment my parents brought me home.
            Again, I went through life always knowing I was adopted. Though at a young age I didn’t really understand what that meant. As I became older, I grew more and more interested about my birth mom. We did not have much information on her except we knew she was a young teenager when she became pregnant. When I was in 10^th grade, I became even more interested in finding out who my birth mother is. My English teacher in high school gave a persuasive writing assignment one day in class. A topic that was listed was “Open v Closed Adoption.” She approached me and said that she thought I would like to write on this because she knew I was adopted. From there, I began researching about open and closed adoption which led me to contacting my adoption agency to ask them about these topics. A long story short, I finished the paper with a greater knowledge on these topics but also with a new interest.
            After I finished the paper, I remember riding in the car with my mom and asking her about possibly contacting my birth mom. At first, I was nervous because I didn’t want to hurt my parents by asking them about my birth mom. But again, I know the Lord chose them to be my parents for a reason. From the very beginning, my parents have been 110% supportive. I know this process was extremely hard for them. I knew it was going to be hard to somewhat, let me go and find out “who I am.” While in the car, my mom told me that I had a letter that my birth mother had written me. At the time I didn’t know that I had a letter, so I was really anxious to read it. The agreement was that when I turned 18, I would be able to read the letter.
            So fast forward a few years and it is my 18^th birthday. My parents handed me a handwritten letter that my birth mother had written 18 years ago. At first I didn’t cry when I read it, but a few months later, I sat down by myself and read the letter again and began to cry. I cried because my birth mother told me how much she loved me and that she wanted the best for me. I cried because I saw how a young teenager had to make such a grown-up decision. Reading her letter made me realize that she had to give up a lot in order that I could live and have a life she wanted me to have. I never had a doubt that my birth mother didn’t love me. And through the letter, I began seeing not only her heart but the Lord’s heart for me.

I will not leave you as orphans;

I will come to you.

-John 14:18

           
     The letter sparked many thoughts about where I came from and what my birth mother was like. When I turned 19, I was able to access my file at the adoption agency and begin searching for my birth mother. It took a few months but when we found her, I really wanted to communicate with her. Through the social worker at the agency, my birth mother and I were able to communicate through emails. She told me where she has been the past few years and what she was doing now. She even sent me current pictures of her and her family. It was really neat being able to see what she looks like and getting to see that she has a family of her own! I was able to tell her about myself through emails, but I felt that I was unable to communicate what I was feeling. I expressed to her that I really would like to have a phone call with her and be able to talk verbally. So a few months pass, and the time came for she and I to talk on the phone. I was nervous, excited, along with other emotions. When she picked up the phone, it was awkward at first, but then we began talking. One thing I will never forget from the phone call is that Jen (my birth mom) told me that she never forgot about me and that she always thought of me. I knew that she probably thought of me but hearing her say that just made me stand back and realize the sacrifice she made 20 years ago. I explained to her that I really wanted to talk on the phone so that I could express how thankful I am. I was able to share with her what the Lord had done in my life because of the choice she made 20 years ago. I told her that I really wanted to meet her so I could thank her in person. I will always remember that day and how I became even more thankful for God’s sovereignty not only in my life, but in Jen’s life as well.
            So what does being adopted mean to me? Being adopted has added a lot to my life. I probably wouldn’t be here today if it wasn’t for Jen’s decision. About two years ago, the Lord really opened my eyes to what being adopted means. Going back to the letter she wrote me, seeing how much she truly loved me, the Lord opened my eyes to see that just like Jen, He too had given up so much for me to live. He had given up His Son so that I could live and have the life He always wanted me to have. He too faced the pain, of given up someone that He loved so dearly so that other’s might live. He has dreams for me and plans for me that I cannot even fathom. Though I was saved at age 13, I began to fall in love with the Lord even more through this new journey in my life. As I tried to process all of what the Lord was showing me, He revealed even more to me! He brought these verses to my mind:

“For you formed my inward parts;

You knitted me together in my

Mother’s womb.

I praise You, for I am fearfully and

wonderfully made.

Wonderful are Your works;

My soul knows it very well.

My frame was not hidden

from You,

when I was made in the secret,

intricately woven in the depths of

the earth.

Your eyes saw my unformed

substance;

in Your book were written, every one

Of them,

The days that were formed for me,

When as yet there was none of them.”

-Psalm 139:13-16 (ESV)

Though I had heard and read this verse many times in my life, this was the first time I began to actually see this verse come alive. The Lord began reminding me that He had (and still has) a plan for me even before I was thought of, even before He created the universe, before all these things, He knew me.I began to cry thinking of how great the Father is! The days that are before me now, “…were formed for me.” You and I have a purpose here. I wasn’t some mistake in a teenager’s life and you weren’t a mistake either. The Lord began to pour His thoughts into my mind and tell me that He has a plan for my life. In the midst of graduating college, trying to find a job, a place to live, in all the craziness, He, the Creator of everything you and I see, has a plan not just for me, but for every single person. He has a plan that is better than anything I can ever imagine. Knowing that my future is in the hands of a Sovereign and Faithful God quieted my anxious heart. My heart became so full of how He has orchestrated every single detail in my life (big and small). 

Being adopted has opened so many doors in my life. I have been able to connect with others around me, and tell them my story. I have also been given so many opportunities in my life. I have been blessed with an amazing family and friends. I have been able to go on several mission trips and most importantly, I have been able to hear the gospel proclaimed throughout my life. Through Jen’s self-less decision, and through the Lord’s renewing mercies, I have been given “a hope and a future.”

For [the Spirit which] you have now received [is] not a

spirit of slavery to put you once more in bondage to fear,

but you have received the Spirit of adoption

[the Spirit producing sonship]

in [the bliss of] which

we cry, Abba (Father)! Father!

-Romans 8:15 (Amplified Bible)

Throughout this journey, the Lord has given me a heart for the orphans in our world today. He has also given me a burden for the young women who find themselves in a crisis pregnancy or who have taken the route of abortion. The Lord opened my eyes to see how these women need Him just as much as you and I do. Though I rejoice that the Lord has saved me, I don’t need to just stop there. I need to, as Psalm 107:2 says, “Let the redeemed of the Lord tell their story…” I need to tell my story to as many that will hear. He has brought life into these bones so that I may proclaim Him in all that I do. So, through our rejoicing, let us also lift up a mighty roar to Heaven with our prayers for those who have yet to know who Jesus is and proclaim Him as their Savior! Again, He has created us for a higher purpose!

            Many asked me during the process of finding my birth mom, “What if she doesn’t want to know anything about you?” or “What if she doesn’t want to talk to you?” Though I had asked myself the same questions, the Lord calmed my fears with His voice of Truth. He reminded me that even if Jen didn’t want to know anything about me or didn’t want to have communication with me, it doesn’t matter. My identity isn’t in what other people tell me. My identity is found in the Father. He sees me as His child and calls me His beloved, and if all others forsake me, He will remain the same. I have seen the gospel more clearly even through these past few years. I have seen how my life, without Christ, is just like the orphans we work with. I was hopeless, fatherless, and homeless. But through the Lord’s Sovereign hand, I have been given hope, a family, and now, a new name. What an amazing Father you and I have!

But when the time arrived that set by God the Father,

God sent His Son, born among us of a woman,

born under the conditions of the law

so that He might redeem those of us who have been

kidnapped by the law.

Thus we have been set free to experience our rightful heritage.

You can tell for sure that you are now fully adopted

as His own children because God sent the Spirit of His Son

into our lives crying out, “Papa! Father!”

Doesn’t that privilege of intimate conversation 

with God make it plain that 

you are not a salve,

but a child?

And if you are a child, you’re 

also an heir, with complete access to the inheritance.

-Galatians 4:4-7 (The Message)

A New Wardrobe...

Imagine you have old, dirty, clothes, and on top of all that, you have no place to live. But, what if someone came along and offered you a brand new wardrobe? Most likely, you would take them up on their offer! Well I read a few weeks ago of a man in the Bible that did just that. Again, God continues to amaze me by showing me Scripture that I have read before, but when I read it again, it is like I am reading it for the first time. How amazing...

The story begins with a man who is possessed with many demons (Luke 8:26-39). You have probably heard this story before! Jesus casts the demons out of the man's body and puts the demons into the pigs and then the pigs fall off a cliff and into water and die. Hmm...sounds so exciting. :) But when I dug a little deeper into the passage, I saw how my life is so much like this man's before he encounter Christ.

Before this man encountered the Living God, he, "For a long time...had worn no clothes and he had not lived in a house but among the tombs."(v.27) Just this passage sums up this man's life: naked, homeless, and living in a graveyard. This was my life before Christ, I was living among the tombs.

His life was also controlled by the demons inside of him, the Word says that this man, "He was kept under guard and bound with chains and shackles, but he would break the bonds and be driven by the demon into the desert." (v. 29) When I first read this, I thought it was talking about Jesus breaking the bonds, but when I looked more closely, I saw that it was actually the demon that did this. I know in my life, I have allowed the enemy to control parts of my life and let him keep me in chains and then drive me into the "desert." Beth Moore says (in Jesus: 90 Days with the One and Only) it in a way that really allowed me to understand that even demons have a supernatural power:

"Luke tells us that the demons enabled the man to break chains. I feel the need 

to stress something about supernatural power: not all of it comes from God!

...At times Satan is able to display signs and wonders. But remember, ours is the

PRINCE OF PEACE. All conflict HE ordains is for the ultimate purpose of peace 

under His righteous rule."

What I love about this story is the ending... the man who was once naked, homeless, and lived among the tombs, was forever changed once he encountered Jesus. The contrast from the opening sentences to the closing of the story is just beautiful. Let's take a look and see how beautiful this picture really is:

"Then the people went out to see what had happened,

and they came to Jesus and found the man from whom the demons had gone,

sitting at the feet of Jesus,

clothed and in his right mind..."(v 35)

When everyone around him was scared and running around, this man was sitting at the feet of Jesus. It reminds me of how there are so many stories in the Bible where once a person is healed, they seem to immediately run and tell everyone they know (which is a WONDERFUL thing, don't get me wrong!). But here is this man, sitting at the feet of Jesus. The man was no longer naked or homeless, but was found fully clothed (not only physically, but I believe spiritually as well) and in his right mind. BEAUTIFUL. No other can do this, our Savior is Mighty and can do what we think may be impossible! It reminds me of a passage in Ezekiel: 

"When I passed by you again and saw you, 

behold, you were at the age for love, 

and I spread the corner of my garment over you and covered your nakedness;

I made my vow to you and entered into a covenant with you,

declares the Lord GOD,

and you became mine."

(Ezekiel 16:8)

The LORD loves to cover us with His mercy and like this man, even His healing power. Who am I that this God of the entire universe would want to look upon me and heal me, let alone, save me? I want to be like this man... sitting at the feet of Jesus. 

This man later went around "...proclaiming throughout the whole city how much Jesus had done for him." (Luke 8:39) I believe that if the crowd didn't make Jesus leave, that this man would had sat at the feet of Jesus for a very long time! But I also need to be like this man in this area too! When other's push Jesus away, I need to proclaim, even more, how much He has done for me! I want to be found at the feet of Jesus, but also shouting His praises! We aren't called as believers to constantly be sitting at His feet, meaning, that is the only place we should be, but we should also be found proclaiming (like this man) how much Jesus has done for us. Whether that be in your school, hometown, or maybe, even your home. 

As much as I would love to stay and sit at the feet of my Maker, I know there will come a day when I will get to do that for all eternity, so for now, I will proclaim the majesty and glory of the God who saved me and rescued me from the enemy! 

I will greatly rejoice in the LORD;

my soul shall exult in my God,

for HE has clothed me with the 

garments of salvation;

He has covered me with the robe of righteousness....

-Isaiah 61:10 (ESV)